Word of the Day: Allow(ed)

(big sigh...) I don't like drama. I know I'm female and I complain at times, but I really don't like drama. I've come to realize that in life, people who have a problem with you, really just have a problem. If I don't like someone, it's because of how I allow them to make me feel, not necessarily how they make me feel. I mean, how can they make me feel a certain way, ya know? Interesting concept, I know this...but I think we enable most of the drama in our lives by letting people get to us.

I've had some instances this past week where I was left feeling...well, crappy. I felt crappy because I allowed certain situations to get under my skin. I should've just shrugged my shoulders and said, 'uhhh, okay. (pause, shrug) Whatever.' That's my normal reaction to most situations. I try not to let things get to me too much. I don't enjoy feeling bad or stressed or aggravated or bullied, so I just don't. But this week, I think I'd just had enough. It's exhausting to keep a positive attitude and it's exhausting to have to fight certain feelings all the time.

Sometimes you want to quit being a martyr and just say, 'you know what? you're a waste of space... and I don't like you... and it's because I let you get to me, not because you're important or worthy or good enough to get to me on your own!' BUT, you don't say that because you have more tact.

For those people out there who enjoy fighting and belittling (is this a word? I think it is, but it sounds funny and more like a hobbit dwelling than a verb... anyway..) other people, shame on you. Shame on you for not having enough to do in your life than to make other people feel bad. But more than you mean peeps (peeps: a word I picked up from my friend, Holly-hey girl, what's up?), shame on YOU for allowing those other people to make you feel like crap. Whoever you are, if you had a bad week and you had some shallow people step on you to get to the top first, STOP ALLOWING THEM TO GET YOU DOWN!

I'll end my bitch-session with something I learned the other day from my 11-year-old, Aley. Maci was picking at her and picking at her and finally she said this: 'You know what Maci? I would rip your head off right now but I'm not going to, you know why? Because I learned in school today that instead of acting on how I feel when I'm angry, I should just practice self-control. So that's what I'm going to do. Now get out of my face.'

If only I was so wise when I was 11.